Well

I used to be bulimic.Well self diagnosed technically. I used to binge and then a split second afterward I'm in toilet throwing up everything left in my stomach. I felt like a loser back then. Still a loser now. However I'm kind of happy with where I am right now? Nobody noticed me, nobody really care back then.

Would I still be the same if all of that never happened? Scars on my hands are fading so that's a good thing I guess? Doesn't really feel like going there again. I don't want to be like before. Turning back, my life was a mess. I don't really understand myself back then. Still do until now. But, it's okay.

I don't need to rush. I'm in my own pace right now. I know what I need to do now. At least I thought I do 😂.

I'll wait for him. Idk why. Maybe because it makes me feel better about myself? Manipulating myself that I'll be okay if I wait for him maybe eventually I'll get over him. Who knows right? Hey gimme a break a homegirl just had her first heartbreak.

On the other hand, I managed to get closer with my housemate so that's a good thing. We'll see where this goes.